Those damned medications
Blog – She Loves Life Over 50
My first grandee
Plans for 2017
My life changed suddenly one day in June
…when my daughter, who was then 20 weeks pregnant, discovered she was at risk of losing her baby.
We’ve been in this situation before; 3 years ago when wee Connor was born at 21 weeks, and being too premature to survive, died shortly after. (Here’s my Tribute to Connor.)
But this time things are different
Once her specialist decided that everything had been done to halt the immediate risk, the next step to ensure bub’s safety was for my daughter to go on bedrest for the remainder of the pregnancy. That’s when my new job started.
So for the past 12 weeks, I’ve been her day-time carer. Her partner heads out to work and I turn up a couple of hours later. I do some housework, cook dinner and keep my daughter plied with nutritional, mini meals.
At first we were all very nervous about getting to the point where bubs had a chance to survive if she was born prematurely. But once that scary four week period was over, we settled into a gentle rhythm.
Each day passes quietly. A highlight as spring has come, is watching flocks of tuis plunder the kowhai trees on their property here in Upper Hutt.
The only thing to disturb our gentle routine is a visit to the maternity care unit at Hutt Hospital for a scan or an appointment. Often followed by a drive-through visit to McDonalds. (Pure luxury!)
I admire my daughter’s dedication to sticking with her specialist’s directions, as well as her ability to stay cheerful and positive. This baby is being given every chance.
A different sort of celebration
We congratulate ourselves every day – that nothing happens.
There’s a real sense that this pregnancy is a celebration for everyone involved. The specialist beams when we turn up to the 4-weekly appointments. And yesterday it was the midwife’s turn to show her delight at how well things are going. (We are so lucky to have such great maternity support here in Wellington.)
The excitment is building. As each week passes we are more reassured. Baby clothes are purchased, the retro bassinet restored and nappies ordered. Everyone is looking forward to welcoming this little girl in a few week’s time.
I can’t wait to meet my grand daugher. It’s been a long, painful four years for my daugther and her partner. I admire their courage and patience.
So what’s been happening in the rest of my life?
My mental health: Until recently I considered myself ‘in recovery’ from my major mental health melt-down three years ago. Recently I’ve decided, I’m now ‘rebuilding my life’.
Living on medication is something I’m still getting used to. I know that without it, life can be a very dark and lonely place. With it, I do okay. Sometimes really okay and sometimes just okay.
I’ve tried reducing my meds, but the result was more downs than ups. Instead, I’ve learned to cope with the fluctuations. That means I’m still limited in what I can do, but that’s okay. I have a extraordinary life – no matter what.
Blogging etc: I fit in a couple of hours each day to work on my new blog site – SheLovesLifeOver50.com.
By sharing my ideas I’m finding new ways to help women over 50 turn their setbacks into success. (And all going well, over time it will become the platform for a sustainable online business.) It’s a slow build but really satisfying.
Mentoring: I’ve also managed to maintain a few mentoring clients. I love seeing the practical difference I can make in someone else’s life. On this note…
Please check out the C U L T I V A T E Mentoring Lab. A social enterprise that matches female mentors and mentees. I’m excited to be a mentor in their latest partnership round.
If you are empathetic, generous & passionate about women building meaningful careers, they’d love to hear from you.
How lucky am I?
It’s been great to have the freedom to spend the past three months with my daughter. I don’t feel I’ve had to give up anything. On the contrary, I’m the winner during this special and unique time.
And you might think that spending all day, every day of the week, together has been difficult. But that’s simple not the case. We’ve always got on well and now we have the proof.
Oh, and did I say? I’m so looking forward to meeting my grand-daughter.
Have you dreamed of being your own boss?
Have you ever dreamed of being your own boss, or wondered what it takes to build a business? If so, you will enjoy the story on how I founded a flourishing business (The Johnson Group) and more recently how, and why, I became a blogger and coach.
This excerpt is the result of an interview conducted by Cassandra Gaisford, friend and author of four #1 bestselling books including her popular Mid-Life Career Rescue trilogy and How to Find Your Passion and Purpose.
At the heart of both these enterprises sit the values, principles and practices that are the lifeblood for my success in business and in life.
Benefits of Your Values-Driven Business
Determining your values from the inside-out will aid your decision making and fast-track your success.
Creating a business and making decisions that are in line with your core beliefs and values is more likely to be a lasting and positive choice.
It allows you to be who you really are, and do what you really need, in order to achieve what you want. And it will draw like-minded and loyal clients to you.
Creating a values-driven business:
- Allows you to be yourself
- Differentiates you from others
- Plays a key part in creating a professional brand
- Guides your decisions and interactions with others
- Communicates with, and attracts, loyal customers
- Fast-tracks meaningful relationships
- Can inspire loyalty beyond reason.
So where then to begin? Inside out. First determine your own personal values and build your business or self-employment opportunity from this core.
This is the approach Leigh Johnson, then aged 46, took when she established her recruitment business (The Johnson Group).
Following her childhood dream
Having my own business was a childhood aspiration. I love being my own boss – the freedom, flexibility, taking responsibility, and creating something of value that helps others. Deciding what to do was easy. I was working as a recruitment consultant for a large international firm and found recruitment suited my skills and talents.
I decided to go out on my own, and was able to turn that into a successful business and get others to share my goals and values. I was up and running with very little start-up capital, just some cash from my own resources.
Creating her niche
I established the company values and defined the behaviours that went with those values from the outset. Finding the right market and level of service centred on:
- Providing a professional and personal service
- Employing the right people
- Doing business with the right clients
- Innovating to meet their needs.
I developed a brand strategy, created a simple business plan, leased premises and a CRM system, and bought 2nd hand furniture! I hired my first employee, kept focused on our specialisation, then got out there and told people about it.
It’s important for me to be trying new things. I was driven to be successful and this, along with continually learning and sharing, kept my energy levels high. Doing the ‘same old’ and/or repetitive work de-energises me. Going into business or being self-employed creates a fantastic opportunity to learn new skills and also learn about yourself.
Taking a leap of faith
I knew my enterprise could be successful. Initially I worked 60 hours per week. I used specialists for advice and outsourced the things I wasn’t good at. Spending time doing the stuff that creates revenue, and starting to build systems from day one helped maximise the likelihood of success.
The advice I would give to someone who has never started a business is to surround yourself with people who have done it before, or are self-employed. Don’t be afraid to ask for advice. Get a mentor or coach!
Millions of people around the world create small enterprises so that they can feed their families. Start small, part-time and try out some of your ideas.
Business development (face-to-face meetings), networking, marketing and building brand awareness helped me grow my client base. Being socially responsible and creating our Skilled Migrant Programme, in partnership with Victoria University and the Rotary Club of Wellington, has also given the brand a very positive image.
Getting professional advice, (business advisor), using specialists (i.e. finance) focusing on business development and building market awareness have been the secret to success, managing cash flow, and generating regular income.
Best and worst moves
Hiring migrants who brought great skills, excellent motivation and surprised me with their ability to keep growing has been one of the best moves I’ve made.
Knowing what I now know, I would always ensure I hired the best people. They don’t have to be the highest paid.
Worst move? Taking too much responsibility on myself when things weren’t going well which led to burnout.
While I had a lot of technical skills, I’ve had to learn to let go, and trust others. Mistakes happen and we learn from them together.
To maintain balance and find time for my family I avoid being a perfectionist. I look for the 80/20. Sometimes good enough is just fine. And done is better than perfect.
To succeed in business you must be prepared to take responsibility and make decisions, some of which won’t be right but that’s okay. Just keep making them. I also take time out every quarter. You must trust your people and disconnect so that they can make decisions while you are away.
Action and Innovation
Lately, I’ve been using the word ‘enterprise’ instead of business or self-employment. Personally it has connotations involving action and innovation. Also it can be about being socially responsible while being economically sustainable.
Establishing her company values and ensuring her behaviours reflected those values from the outset helped Leigh create a strong brand—one she is proud of.
Her deep belief in equality and being socially responsible, and her passion for helping others is also reflected in her successful Skilled Migrant Programme, giving her brand a very positive image.
It was an inspired move. My own experience working as a recruitment consultant confirmed that many employers discriminate against people from other cultures. I was once moved so much by their plight I wrote a magazine article entitled, What Colour Are Your Skills, to focus attention on the fact that it is what people can do, not their place of origin that defines a person’s ability to do a job well.
Leigh now works less in the business and more on the business to maintain better balance. She is passionate about helping women over 50.
To find out how Leigh’s Self Care Plan can help you go to www.sheloveslifeover50.com
and the Mid-Life Career Rescue series: